One month from now, I should be celebrating my son's first birthday, with blue balloons and a bear shaped cake. I should be watching him put his hands into the cake, making a mess and getting his first taste of something sweet like cake and icing. One month from his birthday, I should be shopping for toys, and teddy bears, books and onesies.
Unfortunately, SIDS has made it so I won't be able to experience the joy of this monumental event. This event that all mothers, all parents dream of. I don't get to hear the squeals of happiness, and see the smiles. Well, I do - in pictures and videos. And I'm oh so grateful to have all that I have. I'm so grateful that I was, am the mother to such a perfect little guy. Forever frozen in time, in my mind and in my heart, as a 16 week old little boy.
In one month, the #SpreadHappinessForPreston day will be here. November 19th. The day he was born, 5 weeks early. The day my life was forever changed. And while the loss is heartrendingly painful, time has helped cauterize the wound in my heart. It will never truly be mended, but I have learned, through my son, that happiness is all around us. We all experience struggles. We all have bad days. We all have our ups and downs - and they can't be compared.
My son radiated with happiness. If I had to write a definition in a dictionary for happiness, it would be just that - Preston. He wasn't a fussy baby. He didn't cry without a reason, and those were few. He grew leaps and bounds - from 4 pounds 5 ounces to 11 pounds 3 ounces in 16 weeks. He had milestones - graduating from the NICU to come home, smiling, giggling, rolling over. And most of all - he taught me a whole new side to life, even without being physically present. I appreciate the small things in life. I find a way to smile every day. I treasure the memories of my son, and am always open to seeing the signs he might send me - a rainbow, a bunny, or just random events that I just know, came from him.
And I want to pay it forward. I want to make the world a brighter place, a happier place, even if it's just one person at a time. I'm hoping that a pay if forward, random acts of kindness day on November 19th of each year, can help make that dream come true. I hope that you will join me in spreading happiness a month from now, on Preston's birthday. What can you do?
- Open the door for strangers, even if you are in a hurry
- Donate to your favorite charity, or to a Children's hospital, or to the SIDS Foundation of America
- Buy the coffee for the person behind you while at Starbucks
- Help out a child in need, or a homeless person (it doesn't have to be money, make them a sandwich, or something like that)
- Give a gift card to someone, randomly, or to a friend, just because
- Send flowers to cheer up someone who's been having a rough week
- Make your husband/wife/children's favorite meal
- Send a balloon up to the sky, with a card attached - for someone you have lost
There are so many things that can be done to just make someone smile - even if that someone is someone you love. Do you have to stop at one person? If you are up for it, make as many people smile as you can. I invite you to share what you have done to spread happiness on November 19th, by sharing it on social media with #SpreadHappinessForPreston. Or by commenting on my blog. Or by emailing me - tsunaze1@gmail.com
I hope you will join me, and that #SpreadHappinessForPreston day is a success. I have cards that can be handed out when you pay it forward. If you are interested, I'd be happy to mail you one. Just email me.
I thank you from the bottom of my heart for considering participating in this event. I hope that not only it makes someone else smile, but that it also makes you smile.
-Cat
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