Just a Sunday

It sure was a filled Sunday, a day which was supposed to consist of only baking (and relaxing).  My day began at 8:00 something when hubby woke me up wanting to go out for breakfast.  Breakfast is certainly not my favorite meal of the day.  I don't like eggs, which are in 80% of all breakfast items.  For a long time I couldn't eat pancakes because they would just upset my intestines.  I've found it difficult to start eating foods that I couldn't have for the longest time; especially when they always caused pain.  So, I'm not the biggest fan of pancakes either...  that leaves... not much :P

But to the point, we were going to go to have breakfast, but it was at a restaurant that's about 30 minutes away.  Then, we were going to go visit our friend Charles who had invited us over to meet his new puppy.  Given that I wanted to bake for a large portion of the day, and that Brett needed to finish putting down the tile in our "front" room, we opted against going to the restaurant and just stopped for a quick breakfast at McDonald's on the way to Charles' house.  We stayed at his place for a little over an hour, I think.  We played with his new puppy, and his 1 year old son.  That little guy sure can run around now, wow.  It always makes me wonder where Preston would be at.  It doesn't make me sad, but it just makes me wonder, you know?  How many teeth would he have? What foods would he like?  Would he be saying a couple words, or be on the cusp of it?  Would he be crawling?  Regardless, I'd be proud of my little guy, and I'm proud of his best friend.  Keep it up big guy!!

When we got home, I started getting everything ready for baking cookies, only to realize I was out of vanilla.  Really?  When did that happen?  Brett had to go out to do an errand and he offered to pick some up for me.  What a lovie!  I took a little break until I remembered that I have a double oven now!  Ta-da!  I started working on getting the bread ready.  Got it in the oven just in time for the vanilla to come home for cookies and with my in-laws!  They were in the neighborhood having closed on the new house this week.  Wanted to scope out the place more carefully before it's rented out and they can't come and go as they please.  A few hours later, several batches of cookies and 2 loaves of bread were ready.  One loaf, already gone and eaten! That was fast! lol

This is the cheddar-apple loaf.  It feels like it's missing something, but I can't quite put my finger on it.  Others seem to disagree since one loaf has already been eaten.  The cookies are, believe it or not, cholesterol free! Or so says the recipe.  I'll take its word for it!  They are a little crunchier than what I was hoping for.  Hopefully the two slices of bread I put in a Ziploc bag with the cookies helps soften them up.  It's worked in the past.

A lot went on today, yet it doesn't feel like the day flew by.  There was a walk today for angels.  A walk to remember, where you walk to honor your little one that has passed on.  I really wanted to go, but felt unprepared.  Unprepared for the emotional rollercoaster that would go on in my mind.  Unprepared because I didn't have any signs, hadn't invited anyone, hadn't raised any funds to help the organization that organizes this annual walk.  It's organized by the same organization which holds the monthly support group I attend.  Hopefully next year.  I want to do everything I can to honor my little boy and felt guilty for not being prepared for this day.  Hopefully this guilt is just something temporary.

I did read something inspiring today though.  This one mama  has two angels, Conner and Benjamin.  I've been reading her blog and it actually helped me find the inspiration to start my own blog.  I'm so thankful for it too, because it has really helped with my healing process.  So, thank you Krystal!  Back to how she recently inspired me.  On every 10th of the month, she celebrates the birth of her two boys instead of grieving their loss.  Like this week, she and her husband went out to breakfast and she ordered orange juice for them, since it was something she craved during her pregnancy with the twins, but it's something she usually can't stand.  So sweet!  I didn't really have any cravings with Preston, but he would move a lot when I had pizza.  Perhaps the 19th will forever now be pizza night.  Another small way I can honor and remember my son.  Not all gestures have to be large.  Not all gestures have to involve the world.  Some can be just between me and him, and his dad.  We miss you little man.  Hope you could smell the cookies and bread mama baked today.  Did you flap your little wings around to come down to smell baked goods for a few minutes?

PS. I was also going to make a hot milk sponge cake but I couldn't find my cake pan and remembered that I packed it away when I emptied the china cabinet.  The cake will have to wait.