Blond little boys named Preston

My husband called me at work last week.  He sounded sad which is very unlike him.  He had gone to lunch with his best friend at McDonald's, and something took place that shook him up.  A little blond headed boy of 2 or 3 ran into him.  Cute little thing.  Then the boy's father said "Preston, be careful where you're going".  Shock.  Twinge of pain.  The unexpected jab at his heart.  I can imagine how painful of an event that can be.  That very same day was the one where I was asked if I had any kids and "no" came out before I even knew it. 

The interesting thing is that, this isn't the first time something like this happens to my husband.  Maybe a month after losing our son, he went to the movies, and the same thing happened.  A little blond haired boy of 2 or 3 ran into him while he was at the soda fountain.  That little boy's name was Preston.

If you ask me, that's too many coincidences to me.  No other little boys have run into my husband.  Two in the span of 6 months?  Two little blond boys, like our little Preston.  Two little boys named Preston.  It just has to be Preston's way of saying "Hi!" to his Daddy.  I know Brett doesn't believe in signs as strongly as I do.  He doesn't get the bunny thing, or how I got there.  I feel like he's skeptical about the rainbows and the feathers.  And you know what, that's ok.  We all have our beliefs.  We all have our ways to dealing with grief.  We all have our techniques for healing, for accepting what has happened.  Part of mine has been through accepting the signs that are sent to me. 

I shared my belief with my husband, that this was our son's way of saying "hello" and "I'm okay".  When I told him this, it seemed to make the painful experience a little better.  I truly pray that these were really signs from Preston, and not just some cruel joke the universe is playing on my husband.  Grief is difficult enough on it's own.  Add that the loss is totally unexpected.  Add that the loss is one that should never happen; parents should not bury their babies.  Add that it's not an easy subject to talk about with anyone.  And then poke at it with reminders of what should be.  That's how he felt.  And I just hope that finding a different way of looking at it has helped him. 

Is there anything in your life that you could look at differently that might change your total outlook on it?  Turn something difficult into something bearable?  I encourage you to try :)