Raindrops (day 18 of 30 days of gratitude)

Not a great picture, but I didn't have another one which had rainfall or raindrops.  It's from our road trip through Oregon in 2007.

The rain is so different in Colorado than what I was used to for 25 years in Montreal.  The rain is light.  The rain showers usually have a short duration.  The rainclouds appear out of nowhere and make way for a clear blue sky just as quickly.  At least, that's the way I knew rain for the past 5 years.  This year, the rainfall has been more common.  What was often a drizzle has been more of a heavy shower.  What usually lasted 10 minutes, now stayed for half a day.  Sprinkles, now sometimes downpours.

On day 18 of my 30 days of gratitude challenge, I am grateful for all the raindrops that keep falling on my head.  Rainy days in Montreal sometimes occurred for a week straight and that often affected the mood of others around me.  It made people grumpy.  It made people more irritable.  I've always felt pretty immune to that.  It takes a lot to get to me, usually anyway.  I probably have a shorter fuse now that I've gone through the horrific experience of losing my son Preston.  But the rain, it soothes my mood.  It creates an ambiance of sorrow where I feel, I guess warranted to feel sad.  It creates softer sounds, like a filter of sorts.  Rainfall radiates tranquility.  The sound of raindrops falling on the tree leaves is pacifying.  Even the sound of drops on the roof bring a sense of peace for me.

I often wonder if we've had more rain for a reason this year.  Have you ever heard the metaphor that states that when it rains, it is because God or Jesus is crying?  If it were true, could it be that He wants us to know that He shares our pain.  That He is sorry for our pain.  Is it perhaps Preston, telling us that he missed us, or him sending this feeling of peace to us?  So many similar thoughts cross my mind, and while I will never know, it's nice to think about sometimes.  All my dreams with Preston are broken, but these thought help me find a way of incorporating him into my life.

The rain has been nice this year to keep everything so green.  To help Preston's Garden grow so fruitfully.  The rain has made for beautiful landscapes all summer, as opposed to just through mid-June.  I've often heard that Colorado is the state with the most sunny days.  I couldn't find anything to prove that, but I do believe it, when you take into consideration that rain showers usually last 10 minutes.  Except this year.

I love letting raindrops fall on my head, especially on a warm summer day.  I love the fog the rainclouds can create in the early hours of the day.  After the rain, comes a rainbow...  There are so many things to love about the rain.  I hope that I never let it sour my mood.  I hope that it makes me feel close to Preston forever.  I hope that the following years, continue to bring us rain that we so desperately need.