Mosquito bites

First and foremost I'd like to thank everyone who shared my blog yesterday and today.  I'd also like to thank those of you who will continue to share it when you feel it might help someone or to help spread happiness around the world in honor of my son. :)  From the bottom of my heart, thank you!!


Perhaps you are someone who is ignored by mosquitos?  Or perhaps, they take more interest in someone else that is around?  I am that someone.  Whoever is around, I can guarantee you, that I will have mosquito bites, and I will probably have more than anyone else that's around.  It's rather interesting that they will leave Brett completely alone, yet they will be all over me.  He won't even notice that there were mosquitoes around until I show him my several bites.  But, there aren't any bugs in Colorado... I beg to differ.  While there's nowhere as many as there are in Montreal, there are enough to be bothersome.  And they always leave that itchy, warm to the touch, red bump. 

Is my blood tastier for some reason?  You'd think with all the chemicals in my blood, that maybe they would finally leave me alone? No such luck, thanks anyways Remicade ;). 

Much like my mosquito bites create a constant itching sensation, and are a constant reminder that I will forever be a bug magnet, there are other reminders that go with me every where I go.  While these mosquito bites come and go, these other scars will not.  While I used to think they were ugly, I am now proud to have them.

The scars from my gall-bladder surgery will always remind me that while I wasn't my toughest, I did survive having septic gall-bladder and recovered quickly enough.  The scars from my bowel resections will always remind me that hope exists and are proof that I am a tough cookie.  I feel I recovered much quicker than from my gall-bladder surgery.  I had a lot of perspective from my previous surgery, I really wanted to get healthy and have a baby.  Perhaps I had a lot of motivation.  I had kind of hit rock bottom having had 2 bowel obstructions and at least 1 miscarriage in a 4 months period.  And then I have my C-section scar.  It's pretty small for a C-section scar, but it will forever remind me of my little Preston.  It reminds me yet again that I am a tough person because as soon as I was able to, I was walking as much as possible.  It may have taken a day or so, since I was so drugged up the first days because of my blood pressure issues, but I took the bull by the horns and did everything I could to be in good shape to take care of my little angel.  Ironically, my scars have created a happy face on my lower abdomen.

Sometimes scars are reminders of painful times; the pain prior to surgery, the constant battle with a chronic illness, the loss of a child.  Sometimes scars can be a reminder of hope; a life without pain, a time when your chronic illness is in remission, the hope for another child, the hope for more happiness in the world, the hope for creating a positive environment wherever you go.  Sometimes scars can be a reminder of how tough one can be.  And some scars are invisible.  My heart is scared, as it's been broken forever.  But that scar is a constant reminder that true and pure love exists.  It's a reminder that we created this perfect little being that impacted our lives more than anyone else ever will.  It's a reminder that I didn't imagine the whole thing.

Do you have scars? Invisible or physical? Have you discovered a positive spin on them once the initial pain of it/them subsided?