Positively February: Day 5

"The soul always knows what to do to heal itself.  The challenge is to silence the mind." - Caroline Myss

I had to look up who Caroline Myss is, unlike Helen Keller who didn't need an introduction.  Caroline  Myss is an american best-selling author who describes herself as a "medical intuitive" and "a mystic".  This is what I found on Wikipedia anyway.  Regardless of what she calls herself, I really like this quote.

"The soul always know what to do to heal itself."  I suppose that's true.  You often become weak when deeply wounded.  You become tired and you sleep a lot more.  Your thoughts become cloudy as the body attempts to protect the mind, the heart.  You look for answers.  You are moved by the simple gestures, and sometimes simply the whisper of the wind.  You become more in tune with your emotions.  The pettiness around you no longer matters.

At least, that's how it worked for me.  As every individual is different, every soul is distinct in it's own very way.  Hopefully suggestions don't hurt though, and you can attempt a few to see how it feeds your soul.  How it possibly heals your being.

• On your day off, just lay in bed and listen to the sounds of nature early in the morning.  The chirps of the birds.  The soft wind.  The leaves swaying in the trees.
• Take a nature walk.  It doesn't have to be in a field, or forest.  It can be in a simple little park.  Admire the beauty that radiates from all that is living.  And I know, living things, can be a tough concept to grasp.
• Lay in the grass and notice all that is around you.  The vast sky.  The grass beneath you.
• Slow down
• Think about good times.  Cherish those moments.

Those are just a few things to try.

"The challenge is to silence the mind."  Ain't that the truth!  I struggle with my mind a lot.  It keeps trying to push me in directions I don't want to go.  It keeps challenging my faith.  Over and over.  And again.  It keeps wanting answers.  It attempts to bring out the anger that is buried slightly below the surface.  It attacks my healing journey and can make it collapse like a house of cards.

I was blindsided today.  I was looking for something that I knew was among the sympathy cards we received after Preston passed.  I'd forgotten how voluminous this mountain of cards was.  Among them, also a handful of cards celebrating Preston's arrival.  The sheer number of cards, coupled with the reminder of what true happiness felt like.  It was enough to make my head spin.  Moments later, it was hubby who was thrown into a downward spiral, as he needed to get Preston's social security card from his nursery for our tax return.  Because he had to declare Preston as deceased.  The reminders never end do they?

Thankfully we have each other.  We're there when the other struggles.  We often ride this roller coaster ride together though we aren't always in the same car.  And I have a huge support system which includes all my readers.  And everyone, no matter what you are going through - you are not alone.  Remember that when your mind goes to dark places.  

Perhaps what I'm trying to say by all this, as my husband didn't quite understand why this quote was positive - your brain will continue to think about the darkness, the emptiness and the sadness.  The key is to steer it into another direction.  Don't take the "silence the mind" too literally  but rather concentrate on the positives.  For me, as difficult as it is - I concentrate on the 16 weeks I had with Preston.  For baby H, who I only carried for 9 weeks, I cherish those 9 weeks.  How they made me feel.  How amazing seeing the sonogram for the first time felt.  And to a certain extent, I reflect on how the loss made me feel.  The deep emptiness and pain - it showed me a whole new side of love.  And nobody, no thought, no nothing, will ever, ever take that away from me.  My children changed me for the better and that's the most positive thing that could have ever happened to me.