Today's subject is books. For me, not much has changed in the past year in the book front. I can't say I've read any of the books relating to grief that were given to me. Though I feel in a better place than I did last year, I just haven't been compelled to picking one of them up. It's not that I don't think they will help. Maybe it's because holding a book is so involved, and requires concentrating on grief related topics for an extended period of time?
Whatever the reason may be, I do have books about grieving, but I don't have any that I can recommend since I haven't read any.
That does not mean that I don't have any recommended reading. I certainly do. Reading quotes and stories relating to grief and to losing a baby really brought me a lot of comfort. These words made me feel less alone. Some made me cry because they put into words what I couldn't express coherently. Some made me smile because it helped me gain perspective and I realized Preston was becoming my greatest educator.
Most of the quotes I found through Google or Yahoo, using search topics like "child loss", "losing a baby", "grief baby loss quotes" and then searching for images. I found beautiful quotes and passages. Some were so difficult to read, especially in those first weeks after losing Preston, but at the risk of repeating myself, they brought me so much comfort. They gave my pain a voice.
As I continue through my journey of grief, I now search for quotes about happiness, motivation and positivity. In February, I created an event called "Positively February" where each day I shared a quote that I had read and built a blog post explaining how it affected my life. How the quote made me feel and how I could relate it to grief, losing Preston and finding a way to stay positive through this tremendous, un-measurable loss. If interested, you can find the first post from February here if interested. By the way, I plan to bring back this event next year. :)
And then there are blogs. While none of the journeys I've followed are exactly like mine, they helped me along the way, and continue to. Sometimes, these women see things differently than I do, while other times, they are able to put into words what I haven't been able to. I relate to these stories and they help me feel not so alone.
There's Fish Bite Moonbeams, Krystal's blog dedicated to her sons Conner and Benjamin. What a great resource this has been. The loss of her sons, and how she was able to integrate them into her life helped me find ways to keep Preston close to my heart, and aided me in finding ways to integrate him into my every day life. Without Krystal, I wouldn't be eating pizza every 19th of the month. The other great thing is that, Krystal now has a baby girl. She's almost 8 months old. It's been nice to read about Krystal's fears through pregnancy after loss, and also to see how things are now. It brings me much needed comfort.
There's HereComesTheSun. Nora's blog in the form of letters to her daughter Josie. This blog is always so beautiful and eloquent. Topics that I wouldn't necessarily think of writing about. It's unique and personal format motivate me every time I read passages.
There's The Lewis Note. Rachel's blog (now on a new website). Rachel has been through it all. Has had a handful of losses, including a very recent one. So sorry to hear Rachel. :( She's a foster parent. She's adopted a daughter. She's dealt with infertility. I call all parents who have lost a child survivors. If that's the case, Rachel is a champion survivor. She's extremely talented, well spoken and is able to include loss when speaking of trending topics on the web. She too has been a great resource for me.
And there you have it. Books may not have helped me, yet. Reading is a whole other story. Without it, it is doubtful that I would be where I am at today. Thank you to all who have made these quotes available on the web, and even more to those who are actually quoted And thank you to those who write blogs and share their stories, and experiences, and inner most thoughts. You help more than you know.
You know this already, but you have helped me so much through your blog as well. I cannot express how grateful I am that I found your blog. There are days when I don't have the words to describe how I am feeling, and then you write something and I think "yes, that's exactly what I've wanted to say." Preston is such a big part of my life now, through you. I think of him every time I see rainbows, or see a bunny. Thank you for bringing him into my life!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad I've been able to help you too. That means so much <3. I feel the same about your boys. I think of them every starry night.
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