Guardian Angel

I remember wondering about guardian angels when I was little.  Did they exist?  Who was mine?  Would I always be watched over?

As an adult, I thought angels a lot less.  Perhaps the harsh reality of life made it seem like surely they didn't exist?  Or perhaps, the fast pace that is now our every day lives made it so I just didn't think about it.

When Preston was born, I prayed.  I prayed a lot.  I'd ask God to watch over him when we were sleeping as I was frightened for him.  He was so small, and had been rushed into life, sooner than he was ready for it.  I believe I prayed every day and night.  In the morning, thanking God for watching over my son, and at night asking him to watch over him while I couldn't.

I'll be honest, I've prayed a lot less in the last year and a half.  Probably hardly at all.  While I don't have many formal prayers anymore, I still find myself talking to God, and to Preston often.  Almost every day.  Asking them to watch over this little girl while I have little control as to what is going on inside of me.  

In the last months, I've come to realize that guardian angels really do exist.  Samantha's is her big brother Preston.  Anytime I get overly worried, bunnies come to the rescue.  Or little kicks from Samantha as if she was just awoken from a nap to let her mama know she's alright.  It's a blessing to have Preston as a guardian angel for his little sister.  

At the same time, I'd give anything for him to be here on earth instead.

I often wonder if angels come down to earth on occasion, or if they are simply spiritual beings.  I don't have a definite answer but have an interesting story.

Yesterday, on our way to run some errands, my husband stopped for coffee at a local coffee shop.  I usually go in too, but for some reason, I stayed in the truck.  Within minutes, I saw my husband through the shop window waiting for his coffee.  There was the weirdest shadow.  Surely an illusion caused by light.  Or was it?

I saw what seemed like a little blond head, leaning against Brett's shoulder.  And then I noticed the wings that wrapped around my husband's back.  Rainbow colored wings.  I stared at it for minutes, and eventually looked away, thinking I was crazy to think Preston was there.  I looked back a little while later, and the shadows were there.  I smiled, and realized that guardian angels surely exist.  And when we least expect it, there they are.

I want to say a special thank you to Krystal, Conner and Benjamin's mom, who sent me the crystal angel (with rainbow wings) pictured above.  I received it at the beginning of August, and plan to place it in the nursery once we venture in there and turn it into Samantha's room, though we plan to leave some Preston things there.  For now, it rests on our dresser, on Preston's lion blanket, next to his urn and a couple other tokens that remind me of him.

We are about three months away from meeting miss Samantha, and I felt compelled to go look at a few things we've bought for her.  I felt a picture of something of hers, tying it to the fact that Preston is her guardian angel would be fitting.  We bought this headband and slippers about a month ago.  Is it odd that I don't remember that they were bunnies? Coincidence?